The First in Three Million
by Enula
Summary: Sometimes all it takes is one certain moment for everything to change.


_AN: For IronStrange Week: First Contact_

* * *

 **The First in Three Million**

In all the times that Stephen Strange died when he was in the time loop with Dormammu, he never once felt his death, his untimely fate, in his heart. He was sacrificing nothing more than himself. He didn't feel like he had anything on Earth (or anywhere else in the universe, for that matter) to go back to. In a way, it was good to be that _free._ In another way, it was torture knowing there was no one to miss him.

He tried not to dwell on it too much when the whole ordeal was over. He threw himself into studying more magic, more spells, more of life outside the physical realm. It paid off. As he stands in front of Thanos with two mystical shields in front of him, he can at least agree that all his free time did pay off. There was no way he could even stand a small chance against Thanos if he didn't know how to conjure many of his recent spells.

Yet it still didn't help, not really. He just felt himself die another three million and sixty-four times at the hands of Thanos, all of them which also ended in the destruction of half the universe.

Awful, how many different possibilities there are, how many different outcomes that stem from one specific moment. One tiny detail can alter very little sometimes; other times, like dominoes, it sets off a wide range of effects that keep getting worse and worse.

The people he was with on Titan were always doing everything they could to stop Thanos, that was the one constant. Never once did any of them back down, despite the odds against them, despite the fear in their eyes.

That's when he tried to open the portal to bring them back to Earth for the battle. With all the other Avengers there, along with the Guardians and the Wakandans, they were able to defeat Thanos...or at least, they were able to destroy the Mind stone and, without the Time stone, he had no way of getting it back. He disappeared into the galaxy, and everyone had to count it as a win.

As everyone was busy celebrating the victory, Stephen caught Tony's eye. He was holding his hand over the electromagnet on his chest. The world went quiet for Stephen as he made his way over to Tony, and there was an uneasiness settling down on him.

"Tony?"

Upon hearing his name, Tony's eyes clouded over and he released his chest with a shaky hand, and Stephen saw the large gap where the glowing device should have been. It was like a scar that refused to hurt unless noticed and acknowledged.

"When did that happen?" Stephen spoke fast, and reached out even faster as Tony's legs gave way to crumple to the ground. "Tony!" He was on his knees beside the broken IronMan and the fear and helplessness that he had when he first lost use of his hands, came back hitting him like an exploding moon.

Tony's eyes were wide but losing light, and the exposed wires in chest twitched pathetically once, twice.

Stephen called for help over the celebration. Tony grabbed onto his hand with the last of his strength, and he was trying to talk, and he was afraid of dying, and this happened to him too many times in the past for him to go through it again.

Then there were Wakandans picking him up and taking him to the palace where they said they would try to save him. Stephen didn't realize until then that this was no victory if Tony Stark died.

"What's happening, wha-what's going on, why is he-?" Peter Parker came stumbling over to where Stephen now stood, watching as Tony got carried away. "N-no...no, Mr. Stark can't die now, we just won, _**we just won!"**_

Stephen could tell the teenager was entering a breakdown and pulled him into his chest quickly to keep him grounded. It was hard...the kid was strong and struggling, but Stephen held fast and kept his arms tightly around his smaller frame until Peter's will broke and all the trauma he suffered along with seeing the life draining from Tony came flooding out and spilling on Stephen's shirt.

Hearing wretched sobs coming from the young superhero made it hard for Stephen to choke back his own tears. He couldn't pretend to know Tony as much as the many people surrounding him, but he did fight Thanos by his side millions upon millions of times. And he could tell that everyone around him, especially the one in his arms, would mourn Tony more than he would ever know. Did Tony know how many people he would be leaving behind? It seemed to Stephen that he tried to take the brunt end of a lot of pain and hold it inside.

Thankfully, the Wakandans are miracle workers. The best of the best worked the rest of the day and all night to fix him until they finally came out of the operating room to say that Tony was going to live.

Peter looked frightened to go in to visit, but Stephen put his arm around his shoulder and walked into the room where Tony was resting on the bed. The glow coming from Tony's chest was as brilliant as ever, and the light reached his eyes as he looked over to see his first two guests.

"Glad it's you two," he admitted with a small smirk, and was left with no choice but to open his arms when Peter threw himself forward for a hug.

"I'm so glad you're alive, Mr. Stark, I kept thinking about everything that just happened and what I could have done to better help you so you didn't get shot in the heart, but I honestly didn't even notice it, I'm so sorry, Mr. St-."

"Kid, you need to take some chill pills, I ever tell you that?" Tony said, but it was obvious he was glad to be holding the crazy erratic boy in his arms again.

"You have a few times," Peter answered, missing the rhetorical part.

Tony's eyes roamed up to see Stephen standing back just watching the scene play out. Stephen nodded to him, and the cloak unwrapped itself from Stephen's shoulders and went over to the duo to wrap itself around them in an embrace as well.

"I bet you feel left out, don't you?" Tony questioned Stephen. But before he could answer, Peter lifted one of his arms to the side to invite Stephen to join in.

"You helped me when I thought I lost him," Peter said unabashedly while looking to the sorcerer.

Tony's eyes flitted to Peter before reaching back up to Stephen and finally waving him over. Stephen felt the blush rise up from his neck, and he wasn't sure why, but he glided across the room and got pulled down to them by his cloak.

"Good to know the kid has someone if I ever go," Tony admitted, and though there was a sarcastic tone in his words, the purity of the statement did not go unnoticed. "And, uh...thanks for sounding worried when you thought I was about to die."

Stephen straightened up quickly at those words, almost insulted that Tony would think otherwise. But then he thought... _of course,_ Tony still doesn't realize that there are people that actually care about him, and they're not just pretending.

He was going to have to fix that.

"I'm glad you're okay, Tony," he says simply, trying to keep all emotion from his voice, "I have to go back to the Sanctum in New York to check on something, but I'll be back."

He turns to go, but is surprised when Tony reaches out for his hand. Stephen doesn't have the strength to look down at him, the thumb gliding over his hand, his scars, is making his heart beat as wildly as it did in battle and he doesn't know how to handle it.

"Hope so," Tony responded. Two simple words that hid the meaning of a thousand confessions.

Stephen finally met his gaze and, for someone that was so unsure of his worth, Tony sure could hold a fierce and penetrable stare.

"I promise," he answered, relieved that his own two words held that much power as well. Tony's hand slowly slipped from his, and Stephen felt himself flinch at the desire to catch it again.

"See you later, Doctor Strange," Peter quipped up, looking much more like his normal self.

He nodded, said, "Just Stephen is fine," then made his portal that led him back to the Sanctum. He finally let out a long breath. He looked down to the hand that Tony held on to and swore he still felt his presence lingering there.

Not wanting to ignore these enlightened feelings, Stephen found himself smiling as he made his way to the library, went down to isle five, summoned a particular book, then lit it on fire to reveal the Time stone he had hidden.

But before he could celebrate the safety of the stone, a large hand wrapped around his neck and tore him off the ground. He only had a moment to look into Thanos' greed hungry eyes before he heard his neck snap. But before everything went dark, he saw the rest of this timeline's future. Thanos turned back time to put the Mind stone back together and crushed Tony's chest in to the point of no returning before snapping his fingers and half the world went out.

And then Stephen was gasping as he awoke in the next timeline to try again.


End file.
